How to Have Bathroom Sex, According to a Sex Expert

Of all the places to have sex — in the shower, on vacation, in your car — there’s one place that truly reigns superior over the others: the bathroom. Though the bathroom is better known for being the place you brush your teeth or relieve your post-coffee stomachache, it’s also the perfect setting for a sex session.

Maybe it’s not as comfortable as your bed or as sexy as being on the beach, but there’s a reason why bathroom sex remains a hot fantasy seen in movies and TV shows. “Bathroom sex can feel a bit taboo or naughty,” clinical psychologist Lisa Lawless, PhD, says. Add the thrill of novelty and spontaneity to that naughty feeling, and you have a recipe for some of the horniest sex of your life. But what really is bathroom sex, and how do you realistically have sex in a bathroom?

Whether you want to spice things up with your partner or you are curious about the logistics, here’s everything you should know about bathroom sex — including the not-so-fun risks to be mindful of.

Experts Featured in This Article

Lisa Lawless, PhD, is a clinical psychologist and CEO of Holistic Wisdom.

What Is Bathroom Sex?

Bathroom sex is exactly what it sounds like: sex in a bathroom. “Bathroom sex can be any sexual activity in a bathroom, whether at home, at a party, or in a public bathroom,” Dr. Lawless says. But remember, there’s a lot of nuance as to what “sex” is. Because of this, bathroom sex can include any form of foreplay, penetration, oral sex, masturbating, or deep kissing.

How to Have Bathroom Sex

Though it might feel crammed and you may not know where to place your body, bathroom sex does not need to be a logistical nightmare. If bathroom sex is something you want to try with a partner, start by visualizing what that experience would look like.

Even if you want it to be spontaneous, it’s always a good idea to communicate your boundaries and preferences before anything happens to ensure you’re on the same page with your partner. To do so, ask your partner the following questions: Are you OK with public bathroom sex or do you want to keep things at home? If OK with public bathroom sex, what are the risks we should be aware of? What sex positions are you interested in trying? Is the expectation that we will use the shower or tub too? Do you have any concerns? Is there anything specific you want to try?

Once you and your partner(s) have talked through what the bathroom sex will look like, it’s really as easy as just making it happen from there. Dr. Lawless suggests only using stable surfaces, avoiding complicated sex positions (more specific bathroom sex positions below), utilizing sturdy counters and walls, and avoiding putting your weight against glass doors.

If you want to try bathroom sex without a partner, NBD. Simply masturbate how you otherwise would, but do it standing against a wall or sitting against the sink or toilet.

Bathroom Sex Positions

No need to pull out the most challenging sex positions you can think of. Dr. Lawless suggests keeping things simple by doing easy sex positions — one of which could be the standing doggy-style position. Simply lean over the sink or a wall and let the penetrating partner enter you from behind.

If you prefer something face to face, Dr. Lawless recommends the standing leg wrap. In this standard position, the receiving partner leans with their back against a wall, raises one of their legs, and wraps it around their partner’s hip. The receiving partner could also sit on the sink or toilet if it’s easier for the penetrating partner, or the penetrating partner could pick up the receiving partner so that they’re completely off the ground against a wall.

For an oral-sex position, simply have the receiving partner stand against a wall while the other partner rests on their knees on the ground. (Just note that in this position, it may be obvious what’s happening if in public. More on the risks associated with bathroom sex below.)

Bathroom Sex Risks

The biggest risk associated with bathroom sex is getting caught if you’re in public. “Especially in public restrooms, there’s a risk of invasion of privacy or being caught, which can lead to embarrassment or even legal consequences,” Dr. Lawless says.

Always be mindful of your environment. Though you and your partner may consent to public bathroom sex, random bystanders do not. For this reason, it may be better to try bathroom sex in the comfort of your own home or at a sex party where bathroom sex is permitted.

Another reason to avoid public bathroom sex: cleanliness. “Public restrooms can harbor germs,” Dr. Lawless says. “Sexual activity in such spaces can expose individuals to infections if surfaces are not clean, and this can be especially important to avoid getting any bacteria in the urethra to avoid a UTI.”

Bathroom sex is an incredibly fun experience, but it’s important to be mindful of the risks associated with it. Remember, your sexual fantasies do not outweigh other bystanders’ comfort levels, so it’s always best to play where strangers won’t be around.

Taylor Andrews is a PS Balance editor who specializes in topics relating to sex, relationships, dating, sexual health, mental health, and more.